Catching up with the Felty Five Family

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feltyfive

Catching up with the Felty Five Family.

I am going to play catch up with news from my crazy family.

I like to call us #feltyfive!

Then I will end with my personal favorite, the Chandler Chronicles.

Lets catch up on my family!

Austin, my son is now 2!! I know, I know, cry me a freaking river right?

But seriously though, he’s fucking crazy.

He is the only one out of my three children that hits back when I spank him, He runs, dives, and cries when he does not get his way.

In the end he finally tells me he loves me and kisses me, just when I am about to lose my shit.

This has gotta be a boy thing right?

I mean, I feel like grown men do this as well?!?

They push you to your limit then tell you, “you are pretty.”

Austin is smart, talking like crazy, mean to his sisters, sometimes mean to me, but truly the completion to our family of five.

Lets move on to Parker. Parker is my eight year old.

Before I give the low down on her, let me remind you all that I grew up with ONE older brother and SEVEN boy cousins.

No girls, no drama.

I was made fun if I even if I thought about crying, which is why it makes me extremely uncomfortable nowadays to see or even hear someone cry.

Parker is a crier….and not just a little cry, a super dramatic, Oscar worthy crier. The sad part is, I feel horrible when I ask her “but why are you crying about that?”

Seriously guys, help me to be more sensitive because when hormones hit I am in big trouble!

She also has a smart mouth which is definitely from me. It is hard when you finally realize your mother was right when she said you would get paid back one day(thanks mom).

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Chandler Chronicles
And finally my sweet Chandler….my middle child…my sassy, independent, say whatever is on your mind child.

She is officially 5 and getting smarter by the day.

She is currently in a classroom that is an advanced version of Pre-K and her teacher is a rock star. Chandler has been learning words that blow my mind because she fucking corrects me with them.

For example, I asked her to quit arguing with me she said “I’m not I want to compromise.”  Her teacher loved this story. Me on the other hand, I almost busted my 5 year old’s lip but then realized nope she is right.

Chandler gives me the best stories which is why I came up with “Chandler Chronicles.

I have the best stories from her, read them here

Finally an addition to my Chandler Chronicles…..

Everyone knows boys are typically gassy and gross.

I feel like this is normal right?

Well my husband, whom I adore, while driving home, farts and it smells horrible. The gross part is it keeps lingering, and he laughs because he thinks just maybe he “sharted”.

I say to him first “Babe, I swear if you shit your pants..”

Chandler immediately follows with “Dad, I swear if you shit your pants, I am spanking your butt when we get home..”

But then to top it off, later that night we are eating dinner and my husband farts in the kitchen.

Chandler proudly says “Mom, when I was two I shit my pants everyday.”

Yes, Yes, my sweet girl you did, but can you say poop or pooped from now on????? #cussingmom #needtowatchmymouth

 

feltyfive
felt five
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Elf on the Shelf: Chloe and “P” as in Peter

Elf on Shelf has arrived.

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December is finally here.

While I believe in savoring each holiday I’m definitely guilty of peeking around Thanksgiving for all the festivities that will trail behind!

I’m especially excited for this Christmas.

This year Michael and I decided the kids were old enough to finally have an Elf on the Shelf.

Since it was our first year our brown eyed boy and girl elves arrived a week early for a small introduction party and brought treats and a letter from Santa.

After reading our letter we sat down and read all about our elves and how one of the most important rules was that we could not touch them or they would lose their magic. Well of course Sawyer heard a form of no and immediately reached his little hand out, sooo we read it again.

Next we picked out our names.

Ally was pretty easy, she immediately decided she wanted to name her elf “Chloe”. Sawyer also immediately  thought of his elf’s name and proudly announced that it will be “Pee!!”.

I responded with “P as in Peter?” in my best Sesame Street impersonation and his little head nodded in agreement so Peter it was!

As soon as the kids were out of sight our elves flew off for the evening only to return for mischievous and entertaining adventures while we were sleeping.

Night 1 they had a nice little marshmallow roast.

Which prompted a long Q & A about if the marshmallows could be eaten or not.

Elf on the Shelf

The next morning we found our elves making sprinkle angels.

The kids were alarmed at how big of a mess it was and how I (not their dad or themselves) was going to have to clean it.

Elf on the Shelf in sprinkles
Next they had a lovely bath!

Which brought back our Q & A from the first night!

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Elf on the Shelf bath
By Friday morning our elves had decided to do a little decorating for the 1st day of December.

Definitely looks like there’s going to be a lot of clean up for mommy to do the next 23 days!

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Elf on the Shelf decorating

What are some of your best elf on the shelf moments?

 

 

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Embracing the Extra

Embracing the Extra

(especially in #momlife)
humorinthehustle

There a lot of things in life that I love that are extra.

-Extra Coffee in the morning.
-Extra time to sleep in.
-Extra rice on my Chipotle Burrito Bowl.
-Extra money in my back account.

 

My kids though, are so extra!

If you want to read some background on the extra, Catch up on it HERE.

You know that saying… save your drama for your mama?

My kids, definitely save it all for me ( and my husband).

I’m talking to Whitney the other day, she has a daughter a year older than my son, and I ask her

” Does the extra-ness ever stop?”

Without even skipping a beat, she says “NO, the extra just changes.”

If you are unsure what I mean about being extra, let me give you just a couple of my DAILY extra moments.

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There is Only One You!

There is only one you!

Be yourself! Be You! Be Confident!

Summer is Over! And body shaming should be over too.

While attending over 40 field trips this summer, and half of them being water ones, I have established a new criticism.

I wish I had more confidence.

Do I think I am an attractive woman? Yes.

But there are times where I do not feel good in my own skin.

Over the summer, I saw several woman that were flaunting it, and I was somewhat jealous.

They did not have perfect bodies, they were not scar free, they were not stretch mark free, and yet they were in two pieces strutting their stuff.

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The Struggle Bus

All aboard the struggle bus!!


Where we struggle everyday and just enjoy the ride.

I was going to write the little choo choo noise, but just realized that was for a train and we are on a bus.

There has been a lot of change in our family recently, and with every new change is a new adventure.
We are a family of four; My husband, my two children, and myself. Recently we have grown to a family of six, and no I did not have twins.

For a while I had been offering my sister, Darah, the spare bedroom in the front of the house if she wanted to move in with us. Back in May she finally moved in. In fact she took my boring plain white extra bedroom and redid it to this cool grey and navy artsy bedroom; it has a great vibe.

Adding Darah into the mix was a big adjustment, but probably a bigger adjustment for her because she was in OUR dynamics now. You know that dynamic? The one with two screaming kids that live in a house? She’s my sister, we have lived together before, in fact we shared a bedroom for a good chunk of our lives, sooooo no big deal. No big deal is what I thought anyway.Darah moves in right at the end of school. So she had to get used to me constantly saying “Jonah, get your shoes on” or ” Don’t forget to brush your teeth” every morning. Because lets be honest, Jonah is six, and it is hard to get him to focus on anything for more than 2.5 seconds.

Just as things are starting to settle down (as calm as they can be) and we are getting into the groove of things, a sixth person strolls into our lives.

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